"Neither here nor there"

Abstract

Throughout this thesis I have been trying to clarify for myself what I am doing and why. I have had the profound privilege of being able to begin again. A poem captured what I felt about being in this liminal phase. I knew I wanted to explore what I was learning in DAMU fully and concretely. I needed to learn how to be still and wait. I realised how fundamental breathing is in connecting mind and body, and I learnt what a bane the ego can be. I mean ego in the colloquial, not psychoanalytical, sense. It is only by detaching from the criticisms, positive and negative, of others (including mine) that I have any hope of cultivating my own voice. I wrote out of myself and through the process of writing I was more open to the lessons I was being taught every day in classes, and readings. The secret lies in not caring whether I am great or not. Being great is not what is important. Being your self is. As a teacher said, ‘It is difficult, and very easy.’

I finally came to the point when I had written about myself enough. It is time to locate the centre of attention in the world, the audience.